What Men Wish Women Knew

Just to play fair

Published on May 29, 2004 By gothic impulse In Humor

If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

Learn to work the toilet seat; if it's up put it down.

Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.

Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.

No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar

If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one

"Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers.

Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument

All comments become null and void after 7 days

Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, neither do we.

You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not both.

Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes

Anything you wear is fine. Really.

Shopping is not a sport.

There you go guys ... evens it up

Jess

Comments

JillUser

on May 29, 2004

Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes

Guys don't miss because it is difficult. They miss because they can't pay attention to what they are doing! Believe me, I live with 3 guys and 5 toilets. I know what I am talking about here

Cann1bal

on May 29, 2004

Hey sarah, she already has, its her top rated article

If you guys think this is bad... most likely I am the man behind all of these hehehe

but seriously now... I am.

I wonder where this will rank on the list of most profound comments out of a woman... and to think Im the one that has to live with her.... sucks to be you guys.

Thomas

Cann1bal

on May 29, 2004

We miss on purpose, we want you to know how good you have it. By some how either cleaning up our piss on the seat or sitting in it first

dharmagrl

on May 29, 2004

Guys don't miss because it is difficult. They miss because they can't pay attention to what they are doing! Believe me, I live with 3 guys and 5 toilets. I know what I am talking about here

Yeah, I live with 3 dudes and 3 potties. We go through bathroom mats like nobody's business because I have to keep washing them because of boys (big and little) who can't pee straight.

You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not both

Yes, I had noticed that myself.

Truth, truth and more truth in this article.....excellent!

oleteach

on May 29, 2004

In the good old days of my early years of teaching, the boys bathrooms were a delight to clean. Boys love to have fun there. Girls may stuff all kinds of things down the pot just for excitement.

I like the comments about asking your ladies to speak straight out about what they want. You shouldn't have to guess. You men can learn to remember things that will please your ladies...you just have to care enough. It is not really that hard to do...focus

gothic impulse

on May 29, 2004

We miss on purpose, we want you to know how good you have it

Thanks

We understand that men have difficulty targeting the toilet, especially after 6 cans of lager, but we don't understand why they can't use the darn loo roll to wipe up afterwards

Now thats one i should add to my other atrticle

Jess

D4RKN355

on May 29, 2004

I think once men reach a certain age, if they haven't mastered the art of pissing standing up.. they should just sit like the rest of us

OMG Jill.. you have 5 toilets?

alfmorf

on May 30, 2004

use the roll to clean it up?then you would complain the roll was wet!

gothic impulse

on May 30, 2004

use the roll to clean it up?then you would complain the roll was wet!

Ummmm ...try tearing some sheets off the roll

Jess

Sally jacobs

on May 30, 2004

Haha. Loved the article Jess, but you always make me giggle so nothing new there! I'm learning the hard way subtle hints don't work, much to my annoyance, do they really need everything spelling out for them! Grr...can't help but love em though, no matter how annoying!

MadPoet41

on May 30, 2004

Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, neither do we.

Jess~I'm the exception big time. I am TOTALLY hopeless when it comes to directions. That's one of the reasons I will never own a car! .

But I never ask another dude how to get some place. That would be TOO weird (for both of us! .). I am not ashamed to ask a girl though. In fact, I have found that lots of girls are flattered big time to have a clueless dude approach them, and actually ask them for directions. They become totally inspired about it! I even had one or two girls offer to "take" me to where I was trying to get to, etc. I think they wanted to protect me from the big bad world or something, huh? . TOTALLY COOL ARTICLE! YOU JUST GET BETTER AND BETTER! I BET YOU'RE GONNA MAKE THE TOP 10 BLOGGING SITES ONE DAY VERY SOON~SO KEEP ON BLOGGING BIG TIME!

~MadPoet

P.S. And thanks so much for visiting my other blog site! It is really so cool to have some of the old JU crowd coming around, etc. Almost like a nice housewarming (if you consider your blog like a house). THANKS AGAIN!

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